"You must not be as anti-religious as you come across then, or at least more open minded than the average person who sees no need for religion in their life."

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To: cybrgbl@deltanet.com
From: kellym@juno.com (kelly madison)
Date: Wed, 3 Sep 1997 00:24:17 -0600
Subject: Re: quick note

At 12:24 AM 9/3/97 -0600, you wrote:

Hey...

Couldn't fall asleep, and my mind is moving too fast to read, so here I am...I just re-read the 2nd to last message from you...guess I didn't remember it saying you're teaching in Bel Air...but are you having to move there, or am I missing something?

Thanks for the spanish learning thoughts...though it doesn't sound like I have many options right now...I'm not in the habit of going out and recruiting a boyfriend, much less one to meet certain needs...but thanks?!? I do get the concept that "Love is the best teacher" (I think that's what it said - it's pretty comparable to French and I've picked up some Spanish).

So, you don't think you'll be biased toward my opinions and philosophies if you know my profession, huh? You must not be as anti-religious as you come across then, or at least more open minded than the average person who sees no need for religion in their life. Why? Oh, because I work there. In a church, I mean. It's all I've ever done - first job out of college and still loving it. It's a career. What do I do? Well, you know I work with teens, so, yes, I'm a youth director. Actually, the Director of Youth MInistry at First Lutheran Church, Largemont, Nebraska. I'm in charge of the spiritual lives of 150 youth, half of whom I still haven't met, and I moved here 2 1/2 yrs. ago. I just took over confirmation this year from our Ed. Director, and I re-organized the entire program...60 kids and parents are coming tomorrow night to start a program, that, if it flops, could be the hugest nightmare in my career. I changed the program to be more fun, less text books, and more personal. My goal? To have fewer kids feel at 30 like you do, no offense. I have had nothing but positive experiences, and I attribute my strong faith & Christianity to that. It's something everyone deserves.

Now, you say you'll not be affected by this knowledge. Be honest. Doesn't it color things a little? I do hope it's obvious that I am not like the fanatical Christians who think non-Christians' opinions are valueless. In fact, the opposite's true. I think we learn and grow the most when we listen to those who have different opinions from ourselves. Otherwise, we go in circles. I must admit, though, it saddens me to know that someone raised in the church, whose family was/is still "religious" sees no need for God. To quote the great Matthew MacConaughey (ok, the great Carl Sagan), I wouldn't want to live in a world where there was no God.

Well, I think that's enough for now. And hopefully I'll be able to sleep. Take care & write soon. I'm curious to know your reaction to my note :)

later - k.

"Every man, either to his terror or consolation, has some sense of religion."
James Harrington

      Dear Kelly,

      I come across as anti-religious? I'm am troubled to hear you say that and wonder where it comes from. I respect very much people who are firm in their faith and live their lives accordingly. I currently am working in a Jewish school where many people are rabbis, etc. and that causes me absolutely no pain. In fact, I like and appreciate the moral tone is sets at the school. I do dislike it when people are dogmatic, wear their faith on their sleeves, and wave their faith in your face. Unfortunately, there is no lack of such individuals in America. And fundamentalists of all religious flavors annoy me in the same way that hardcore Marxists or Maoists do. From an intellectual point of view, I have never appreciated blind loyalty and close-mindedness. But I respect very much the central role religion plays in the lives of so many people and would hardly belittle it. Who am I to say religion is "right" or "wrong"?

      I personally feel no tug towards organized religion. I was raised Roman Catholic but will only go to church nowadays if someone dies or gets married. I had to go to church every Sunday until I turned eighteen when I was given the freedom to do as I pleased. Last week my uncle said mass at my father's house and my dad weaseled me into being there for it. At first, I was enraged (surprisingly so) and felt very towards my father, but then let it go and sat through the whole thing out of respect for him and the family. It is important for him that we be together in a religious setting, and I will give him as much (once every couple of years, at least). However, something in me is a recalcitrant loner and I will never feel at home as part of the flock or congregation. It is not a spiritual rejection of Christianity or God; rather, it is a reaction deeply rooted in my personality.

      Kazantzakis had the religious vocation; Voltaire did not. Tolstoy lived with the idea of the Christian God always in the foreground; nearly all of Daniel Boorstin's and Sir Isaiah Berlin's exhaustive scholarship is secular in nature, the Jewish Yahweh being a personal matter for them (if even that!). Neither the one nor the other is "better."

      I believe that we all have a "need for religion in our lives." I might re-phrase it that we all need to have rich spiritual lives that confer meaning and dignity on how we choose to live. I wonder if the lack of a meaningful spiritual life has much to do with the enormous sadness I see in America today, so many people wondering at the pointlessness of their lives. I find unsatisfactory those who would argue that we can only trust our reason and that revelation has no role in our lives. Reason and revelation depend on each other and need not be mutually exclusive; I wonder if a person who is all one or the other can truly consider themselves "balanced." In the best mathematicians and scientists like Pythgoras and Einstein, both reason and revelation play central roles in their lives and work.

      Moderation in all things, the Greeks preached; and I would say this is ESPECIALLY true in religion. I cannot tolerate someone like St. Augustine who would have us think that those who do not feel a love for God as does he are fools and most likely forever damned; I find unsatisfactory others like Betrand Russell who in their hubris would follow reason slavishly and not believe in anything incapable of being scientifically proven, rejecting the idea of "God" and divinity from such thinking automatically. Attitude is everything.

      I hope that clears that up. Have a good Wednesday, Kelly, try to get some sleep. We will talk soon.

      Very Truly Yours,

      Richard

"My mind is my own church."
Thomas Paine